Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Self-worth

On my blog, there is a "gadget" that gives a new quote every day. A recent one concerned self-worth.  I don't remember the exact words but it said something like "Just for today, don't let your self-worth be tied to what you do; you are worth so much more than that."

Now, doesn't that give you pause?  How many of us do exactly that...tie our self-image, and therefore our self-worth, to what we do and how well we do it?  On one of the literary boards I'm on, there are several young people who have such things as "I write because I must;"  "Writing is my life;"  and so on in their signatures.  There is also a young man who has never been published, and considers himself a failure because of that.  Come on, now...is writing really "your life?"  Is it the only thing you can do because " you must?"

I'm a grandmother, so I don't have as many years stretching ahead of me as many of you do, to succeed in the publishing world.  Of course I want to be published...actually, I am already, so I should rephrase that to mean, I want my book ( or books) to be published.  But if that doesn't happen, does that mean I am a failure as a person?  Hmm...no, I don't think so.

So stop and think about this for a moment:  is your self-worth really tied to your writing? If for some reason you would have to stop writing forever, does that mean your life is over?  That you have no value as a person?  If you don't get published in the amount of time you've set as a goal, does that mean you are worth nothing?  At least, that you think you're worth nothing?

That would be so sad.  I think of all the authors I read, and the stories that some of them have told about how long it took for them to be published, and I marvel at their capacity for longevity.  Longevity in terms of not only continuing to try for publication,  but also in the mere idea of continuing to write in the face of so many rejections.  Yet these same authors did persevere and today are fabulously successful.  Obviously, their self-worth was not tied to their writing.

So...who are you?  You are a person in your own right: a son or daughter, a brother or sister, a mother or father.  You are valuable to the people in your life...your family, your friends, your peers, associates and co-workers. Your self-worth should be tied to the value these people place in you and the kind of person you are, not to what you do.

Just for today, realize this:  Writing is what we do.  It is not who we are.

Think about it.

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